Friday, April 3, 2009

Miami Diners Suckers for the Average

I have been a contributor to Yelp for the last year or so. I began using it to research good places to eat not only in Miami the few places to which I have traveled in the past year. At first I found the site to be helpful. Recently though, it seems that Yelpers are WAY too generous in their reviews. It seems that this is not unique to the Miami area however I think that MiaYelpers are jaded due to the utter lack of an established culinary tradition in the area.

I discovered recently that I'm not the only one who laments on this subject. One yelper reviewed someplace I can't remember with this one:

You have to place take-out orders with the chesty, heavily made-up bartender, who ignores you unless you are i) male, and ii) the type of male who has a job that permits him to sit at a sticky bar in an aspirational restaurant, imbibing many martinis with a friend at noon. Piss off. Laura T. http://goshdarnit.yelp.com/

Another one reads:
The food? Kinda not good. What is it about Miami and too much sugar in everything? Does the fact that so many people only speak Spanish preclude them from ever visiting any other cities where they can sample good food? Like New York, Chicago, L.A,, San Francisco, or Seattle? What gives? So far I've eaten at only 2-3 restaurants that actually live up to their reputations. The rest are so sub-par that they're only a notch above Appleby's. And these are places that get fantastic reviews? By the way, I'm not the only person who thinks this. Most recent transplants I've spoken too...in fact all of them....agree. Sorry. Gotta be brutal, and maybe things will change. It's just that when you're spending a decent sum for your meal, it should be decent. Valentina D.

Sure, we have a small handful of "nationally renowned" chefs in the area. But that means nothing if they don't produce. I see reviews of places that read "we loved when Chef Douche had La Comida Mierda, the place was soooo good." Really? Well if it was so good, why did the place shut down?

The problem with Yelp is that there are too many self-important slackers who want to feel and look important by reviewing the trendy joints in town. I guess they figure an "amazing" review of the latest "amazing" place to open will make them look as if they are..."amazing." Furthermore, I suppose they don't want to look silly by spending an inordinate amount of their disposable income on average chow.